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Monday, August 25, 2014

Confessions Of a {HUNTERS} Wife : Part 1

I wanted to start by saying, "Fall is my favorite season". While that is partly true, there are things that I love and don't love about every season. The list for fall is probably the longest though! There's just something about the smell of pumpkin and spices that hits the spot.

Hunting season is right around the corner and I would be lying to say I'm not excited! For MANY reasons;)

reason number ONE: More TV time for me. In our house we have a rule, the computer or the TV. You can't have both. Until hunting season, then that rule doesn't apply to me since Kaden is hardly home.

reason number TWO: It's so fun to see my husband get so excited over something. Even if it means spending 80-100% of our date night at Sportsman's Warehouse or trips to Cabelas. The smile on his face is worth the torture;)

reason number THREE: The leaves change colors. This one doesn't have much to do with hunting but more to do with why I love fall. I love the red, orange and yellow colors this time of year! Also, I know were closer to scarves and boots kind of weather. If you have seen my closet then you know I'm more than equipped.

reason number FOUR: I get more house work done and my house stays clean. Or so it seems! I find that when were not home very much my house stays so much more clean.

reason number FIVE: We actually have a reason to go for a four-wheeler ride. It's so fun when we get to see deer out and about this time of year! Rarely do we see a nice buck, probably cause they know whats coming;) but we still enjoy driving around looking for them.


Kaden has been saving his money to buy another gun, why he needs 4 different guns to shoot a deer is beyond me but if it makes him happy then that's all that matters.

I wish all you hunters out there a safe and happy hunting this season! And may your wives enjoy these next couple weeks;)





Sunday, July 27, 2014

Slow Cooker Cashew Chicken

This is one of the Hubby's absolute favorites lately so I thought i'd share!

What you will need:
2 lbs boneless, skinless chicken thigh tenders or chicken breast tenders*
1/4 cup all purpose flour
1/2 tsp black pepper
1 Tbsp canola oil
1/4 cup soy sauce
2 Tbsp rice wine vinegar
2 Tbsp ketchup
1 Tbsp brown sugar
1 garlic clove, minced
1/2 tsp grated fresh ginger
1/4 tsp red pepper flakes
1/2 cup cashews

Combine flour and pepper in large Ziploc bag. Add chicken. Shake to coat with flour mixture. Heat oil in skillet over medium-high heat. Brown chicken about 2 minutes on each side. Place chicken in slow cooker. Combine soy sauce, vinegar, ketchup, sugar, garlic, ginger, and pepper flakes in small bowl; pour over chicken. Cook on LOW for 3 to 4 hours. Add cashews and stir. Serve over rice. Makes 4-6 servings.
If you want like sauce and want to have some to pour over the chicken and the rice, double the sauce ingredients.


Easy Peasy Chicken Alfredo!

This is one that my Husband actually used to make all the time while we were dating. Super Easy!

What you will need:

- 1 bottle store bought Alfredo sauce. We usually like Prego but Ragu works great too!

- 1 box FARFALLE noodles (also known as "bow tie" noodles.) Really you could use any noodles you prefer. We have used Penne noodles before.

- 1-2 chicken breasts or 1 can/bottle chicken. Shredded.

-Olive oil for cooking
-Chili powder
-seasoning salt
-pepper to taste

Boil noodles in a sauce pan on high for apron 15 mins or as directed according to type of noodles.

In a sauce pan heat chicken in olive oil (I usually just drizzle it over chicken.) I do this so the chicken doesn't dry out. You could also just use water.

Season chicken with seasoning salt, pepper, and chili powder. There is no trick or measurement for this. Just add and taste! :)

Once noodles are boiled, drain. Dump noodles back in the sauce pan and add seasoned chicken to noodles.

Add the bottle of Sauce to the seasoned chicken and noodles. Mix and Serve.

ENJOY! Sometimes we will make garlic bread to go along or buy the french bread from walmart or any local bakery.


Monday, June 30, 2014

{LIVING} The Idaho Way

We have finally settled down in the cute little town of WESTON IDAHO. We are loving every minute being here! It is so nice to be a little closer to family. For those of you who don't know, Weston is where Kaden grew up. I am missing Smithfield a little bit but at the end of the day I am happy to be back in Idaho. The commute to work is longer but I am lucky to get to share it with Kaden! Most days we get to carpool to work and I love it. I love getting to listen to him and the long talks both to and from work. If you know my husband you know that he hates the quiet. I get to hear about everything about his day. It is truly a blessing in disguise.

In addition to a new house we have added a member to our little family. No, no babies, yet! She's the next best thing though :) she is a wire hair dog. Her name is Mika. She is quite the handful at times but we are loving the adjustment in our lives. {I will be blogging all about her soon!}

I get the question "Why Idaho?" a lot. And when I say a lot I mean pretty much every person I tell where we moved to. That and "Weston, Idaho? Where's that?" haha. I usually reply in a semi jokingly way, "Its a small town west of Preston. If you blink you might just miss it!" ;) But really. For those of you who don't know much of anything about weston, well, it consists of:

-Woodward's Convenient Store. Which technically triples as a mini grocery store, gas station and deli.

-Local Post Office.

-One massive church house. Surprisingly, Weston has two wards. Yes, TWO wards. I said to Kaden, is Weston really that big they need two wards? Evidently it is.

-City Office building which I try not to laugh while typing this but literally its the size of our Master Bedroom.


     Six Things We Do for Fun:

1. Walks/Bike Rides. Since Mika has so much energy we have been going on walks at nights. I think its beneficiary to the three of us ;)
When were not taking walks were going for bike rides. We have done this ever since we were newly-weds. Its nice to get out and enjoy this beautiful valley we live in. I have to admit though, Weston beats Logan and Smithfield by a lot when it comes to comparing the view you get while on your ride. I think thats what I love most about living here! It is So BEAUTIFUL here.

2. Yard work. I can't really say this is all fun but it is something we have been working on. I'm just going to say those of you who have nice yards with clean cut grass and beautiful trees, flowerbeds, gardens, I am so extremely jealous. I dream of that day for us. I find somedays I am so impatient and want this luscious Green landscaped yard. Instead all we have to look at is dirt and weeds for now.

3. Game Night/Movie Night. Kaden's Grandma and Grandpa Roberts have us hooked on this game they taught us called TRIPOLEE. I'm not sure if its a legit game or if its made up but it's seriously the funnest game and not to mention I pretty much kick butt at it.
Kaden and I are TV junkies. We LOVE movies and TV shows. We even enjoy watching silly youtube videos together.

4. Campfires. I think this is my most favorite thing. There's just something about summer and campfires with smores. What's not to love?

5. Rzr Rides. I truly married an outdoor guy. He is a little kid at heart and some days I don't think I could love him anymore than I already do. We love to go for rzr rides. Often we stop to shoot guns. Sometimes we take a target with us or just use a mountain dew can and have a little competition shooting. I like to think I make it real competitive for him. That or he makes me feel like I'm a really good shot. Either way I love getting to spend time with him.

6. Date Night. We still have date nights. Some with friends, some just enjoying each other and going to dinner or a movie or even just grocery shopping, lame I know but sometimes you learn to take what you can get and enjoy it! Kaden loves to visit Sportsman's Warehouse and check out things he wants to save and spend his money on. I can't help but tell myself it's a guy thing:) has to be, right?



Although it seems we have moved further from friends and some family we are so happy to be living where we are. I truly feel at home. At times I feel like I don't deserve the life I have, the husband I have and all the blessings I have been given. Our life is not perfect and though it may seem I assure you its the farthest thing from perfect. I once came across a quote that said, "Choose to be in love with your life" When life seems rough I try to remember this quote. I am blessed in many ways, some different from others but at the end of the day, I am blessed.



Monday, May 26, 2014

The long awaited update + {Memorial Day} fun!

I have been really bad at blogging lately but I have a good reason! 

We have been living with my in-laws for the past month, which was not planned but we are glad they don't mind having us! I couldn't have chosen a better mother-in-law, she cooks, she cleans and she even helps me with our laundry! What more could we ask for;) Love you Jen! 

First of all, I can't even begin to tell you how exhausted I am over people asking if we have moved into our house yet. Yes, it's exciting to build a house but I assure you we won't leave anyone out of the loop;) we will be sure to let everyone know when the day comes! (Hopefully sooner than later) 

We have started a little on the yard and couldn't be more excited to sign our lives away! 



As most of you know I am obsessed with watching the Bachelor/Bachelorette. Really, I've come to realize I'm a tv junkie but I  am so excited for Andi's season! Needless to say my Monday nights will be full for a while:) 

We had such a fun memorial weekend. Kaden had school in Salt Lake this last week so our weekend started off with a day in salt lake on Friday. School sucks but it's always fun to spend the last day of the week shopping and hanging out with the hubby. Later that night we went on a date with one of Kaden's old  friends and his cute girlfriend!
Saturday I went with kadens family on a rzr ride while Kaden worked. Yes, his life is rough. 
Today we went for a rzr ride with my family up Dayton canyon. It was so much fun and makes me so excited for summer ahead of us! 




P.S- long story short: I was doing invisilgn and wasn't working fast enough so I switched to braces and will be enjoying them for the next 3 months. So that solves that:) 









Friday, April 4, 2014

Lately {for us}

Kaden and I have been so busy with house stuff and working that we rarely find time lately to do much else. On top of all that we are moving out of our apartment earlier than planned so we are trying to decide what we need to take with us and what we need to leave in our current garage we have. We are moving in with his parents {again} while our house is being finished. If everything goes as planned, which it probably wont because nothing ever does when your building a house ;) , we hope to only be there 2-3 weeks! We are so lucky they love us enough to let us crowd them for a few weeks!

I just want to take a minute and brag about how awesome of a Husband I have! I have spent a ridiculous amount of time on Pinterest the past couple weeks. Everyday I find only about 5 things I want done to our house or made for our house. The list goes on and on.. Kaden so far has been a good sport but I can tell hes starting to get a little overwhelmed. From building our master closet organizers to our laundry room layout and then all his electrical stuff {which by the way never ends!} and then our entertainment center he's building for us. It's been almost 3 years of marriage and I am seeing his crafty side come out! I can ask him to make me just about anything and he does it. I think he was just as surprised as I was that he could build furniture. He loves it :) and it also gives him a reason to buy all these tools he finds at Lowes.


I will try to do my best to blog throughout the next two months of all this craziness happening!





Wednesday, March 26, 2014

#houseupdate: walls, windows, electrical part1 and a roof!

Things are definitely moving along! It's so exciting to see it all start to come together but the impatient side of me tells me it's not fast enough;) 

Kaden managed to get all his electrical done. A HUGE thank you to those who helped him! I can't even begin to tell you how helpful you were and how grateful we are!! 

We went up there yesterday to check things out and we now have a shingled roof and all the insulation is done! Yay! 

The next step is drywall. We are hoping when we get up there this weekend it will be hung and ready to be taped and textured:) 

After drywall we can start on our tile and I am so undecicive about it all. When building a house I never thought the one thing that I would be undecided about would be tile. Yes, of all things! Luckily I have an amazing aunt coming to my rescue and is meeting up with me Thursday to help this process move a little quicker:) 






And a picture of our cute little helper a few weeks ago :) 







Thursday, March 6, 2014

Love at First Sight



I came across this china set about 2 1/2 weeks and seriously could not stop thinking about them. Literally, I would dream about them. I kept telling myself "I HAVE to have them!" 

I used to think it was so silly when I would go to someone's house and there they would have dishes on a display shelf in a hutch. I never got it. I have now turned into that silly old married lady. I told my husband when I opened the box and pulled them out, "I feel like an old married lady now" I told myself I don't know how many times that I wouldn't buy fancy plates and china. We'll it so happens when I see something I have to have, I HAVE to HAVE it!! 

Kaden told me I had to save my own money to buy them but little did he know I would actually do it;)  I could tell he thought it was silly and I totally understand why but I am so excited to have them in our new home! 

Those who know my husband know that he is good at just about anything when it comes to wood crafting. He is planning on building a hutch for my china. I really don't know how I got so lucky! He is too sweet:) 

Wednesday, March 5, 2014

I'm feeling 22...

I feel like this post is appropriate since I just had a birthday. I know I'm still young to most but honestly I always thought 21 was a big deal when it came to age. I feel like time and I are not on the same page. It's funny because when people ask me how old I am I have to urge to say right away "19!" Haha I think because the year I turned 19 it was everything for me!

 As poor as my husband and I were when we first got married I look back and think to myself I wouldn't trade it for anything in the world.  I feel as if marriage has helped me grow up in ways I never would have thought possible. We didn't have much money but we still managed to make things work and have fun. 

Earlier this week I went to lunch with my grandma, my dad's mom. She is seriously my favorite person besides my husband:) we went to Chillis and we talked and talked. After I left I got emotional thinking about all the time we spent together while I was in beauty school. She lived about 10 mins away from school and would make me lunch EVERY single day. Sure I was grateful but looking back I don't think I can express with words what it meant to me. Even though most days it was Mac and cheese and a frosted brownie I will never forget how good I had it. She has never missed a single one of my birthdays and never believed in gifts so I always got a card with a $20 bill. When she made the comment before I got in my car that day "I don't see you enough anymore" I was really torn. Since Kaden and I have been married I have maybe been to her house 4 or 5 times. As much as I would just like to use the excuse "life gets busy" I should be making time out of my schedule for her. I know I owe her that much! 

Since my birthday was on a Sunday we decided to celebrate on Saturday. We went to dinner at Olive Garden with my two uncles and their sweet families. My uncles for the most part were more like brothers to me than they were my uncles. I can't complain, they are pretty cool:) 

Sunday we spent the day with Kaden's family and his mom made dinner for us! She really is too sweet. We love her! 

Monday night we spent with my family laughing and giggle about the dumbest things but I will take what I can get:) 

As always some pics for you:) because what would post be with out pictures to look at. Haha 

My hot date Saturday night;) 


Heading to Idaho on Sunday! 

I had a great birthday and was spoiled as always! 




Wednesday, February 26, 2014

February 2014

I seriously can't believe February is already coming to an end. I feel like we just had Christmas!

Kaden and I have been so busy with work and house stuff that time is just flying. Which, really, lets be honest I shouldn't complain;)



Valentine's Day was fun. Kaden and I went to Lunch at our favorite place, Paradise Bakery. We could eat there everyday. No joke. If you haven't every been there (it's in the Cache Valley Mall) you are surely missing out!  With life being so busy we made time the next week to go see a movie. We went to see ENDLESS LOVE. Ok let me just tell you I loooved this movie! I will admit this was my second time seeing it. I went with my husbands mom and grandma. All I can say is I couldn't get enough;)

I really want to say its better than the Notebook (I know, don't freak out. Just keep reading) but I know way too many people/girls and going to freak out so lets just put it this way,  It's up there in that ballpark.

Lately I have been working on planning a Bridal Shower. OK, I really wish this was my job! It is too Fun and I have Loved it! So here is a sneak peak of the Invites I just finished up.

 
Cute, huh? 







Sunday, February 16, 2014

The Church is True

I woke up this morning not feeling my best. I struggled as the thought of attending church just didn't seem to want to fit my day. I seriously LOVE our Smithfield Ward! I think the saddest part about us building a house and moving is that we have to leave our ward and all the friends we've made.

As good as my morning was going we failed to make it to sacrament... We Teach the 4 year olds in Primary. We have been doing so good at keeping them reverent and quiet but last week all i can say is they were SOOO Naughty! The previous week we had a Sub. and I'm not sure what happened but holy cow something had changed. As much as i was dreading it :( we made it to Primary today.  I can't believe how quick my attitude changed to see one of our cute little girls light up when we entered the room. Later on in Primary it was announced that the little girl and her family were moving and this was their last week. Needless to say i was surprised! 4 year olds talk about anything and EVERYTHING and she had never mentioned they were moving. I am sad she won't be in our class anymore but I'm glad we made it to Primary this week. 

Our 4 year olds were good this week and they were so cute. Kaden and I even giggled and laughed at some of the things they told us about their week they had. Joslynn love love loves food! Besides her brother Tyler it's all she talks about (she has 2 other siblings as well). Nicole told us someone was taking her candy from her room and when Kaden asked her if it was one of her sisters the look on her face was priceless, she sat there for a min considering it and then just said "I don't know?". Alex(he is new to our class this week, they just moved into our ward) told us he has a sister named Avalon and when she turns 5 they will change her name to A.J.   Uh..... haha were still not sure what to think on that one? He also told us his middle name is CTR Man. :) They are so cute but can be quite a handful sometimes. The other two boys in our class didn't make it this week but Carter every week asks us why they put nails in Jesus' hand and put him on the cross, EVERY week. For some reason it really bothers him that they would do that to him. He is our "why" child. He asks a lot of "why"s.  He even puts my own knowledge of the gospel to test sometimes;) . Masen is our other boy in class and he is VERY OUTGOING but so smart! 

I am so very grateful for the church and gospel in our lives. I can't imagine not having it. I am so thankful to be able to attend any temple of our choice and for our Primary class, they have taught me so much already! I'm thankful to have a Husband who is a great example for me and will be a good one for our children. 


Kaden found out this week that TEC might be sending guys to do electrical work on the SLC Temple as they update some of the inside over the next couple years. He hopes that he will get to go help!



Monday, January 27, 2014

The past few weeks..

A couple weeks ago we took Bella with us to Hardware Ranch up Blacksmith Fork Canyon. It was so fun! I kinda didn't know what to expect because we had never been but it was really cool. As they pulled us around to look at all the elk they talked about fun facts about the elk. They had around 500 there the day we went. Yes 500! 

It was so cool to see them up close! Unlike deer they will actually let you get somewhat close to them. They feed them  Dec-March in hopes to keep them away from city limits. 

There were tons of females and their babies and a few bigger elk but if you ask my husband none of them were really big. I could sense some disappointment but we still had fun! 

They had a lodge on the hill that you can go in and tour a room they have full of fun things pertaining to wildlife in general. So cool! If you haven't been you should take a day and go up to see it! 





USU hockey game we went to the night before. We ❤️ Hockey! 

The past couple weekends we went iceskating at the outdoor ice rink in Logan. It's so much fun! It reminds me of the days I used to take figure Skating lessons. I love that my parents were always so supportive in anything I wanted to do. I asked Kaden what he thought of ice skating. He did so good which I think is why I was caught off guard by his response. "I go because I know how much you like it.." He is too good to me! It makes me sad that he doesn't love it as much as i do but it makes me happy to realize how much he loves me! I secretly am waiting for him to admit that he does like it. We'll see:) 






I feel like January went by so fast but I'm looking forward to February and March! February, because I got my husband the best thing that I'm pretty sure he will love for V-Day and March because it's the month of my Birthday! Really, who doesn't love the month of their birthday? 

So far 2014 is treating us well! We are so excited for what this year is going to bring us and couldn't be more happy in life! Though I'm sure struggles will come I'm glad to have a husband who tries to help me see past the hard times and makes every effort to remind me that this is life and there is no reason to be unhappy. I truly do Love him! Often times I wonder how on earth I got so lucky to be his wife. 












Friday, January 24, 2014

We Have a HOLE!

They started digging our hole on Monday for our house. Things are finally starting to feel REAL for us now! I was up there on Tuesday to look at and well... It's a Hole! Not much else :) 


They poured our foundation later this week and I'm excited to stop by and see it this weekend. I wish we lived closer to see the progress every day but that's not the case and life gets busy. 

I still can't believe somedays that this is really happening! I would have never thought at the age of 21 I would be building a home! So crazy.  I'm so thankful for such a hard working husband. I would be so lost with out him. 


Saturday, January 18, 2014

My very first TUTORIAL!

Although I dream of the day when I have a kick-a blog with tons of craft tutorials, let's face it, it will probably never happen. I seriously love getting my craft on! Just ask anyone who knows me. I also love to keep it budget friendly! Today I decided to re-do (..uh more like replace;) ) my kitchen canisters that hold my baking goods, I.e flour, sugar, brown sugar, and powdered sugar. I have been on a serious hunt to find something cuter to do other than the fabulous Walmart ones I have. Although I didn't find an example anywhere (yes I even spent hours on end on Pinterest.. And I just couldn't find anything that stuck out to me) I came with these cute things! 


Seriously:) I hope you find them as cute and fun, not to mention EASY peasy, as I did! 

Everything I already had or found at Hobby Lobby. The canisters were under $4 (they were on sale 50% off) I got four but it's totally personal preference. 
This was for my biggest one. So really budget friendly! 

I am going to be doing my kitchen in our new home red and mustard. Probably two if the hottest colors right now, they are not hard to find. So I chose to use burlap and twine but which is actually called Juke? I found that out today;)  anyways you will also need some embellishments (I chose to use the flowers) a hot glue gun, and scissors. If you don't have a hot glue gun any strong glue will work. But really who doesn't have a hot glue gun?? 

All four canisters were really simple. 
My tallest one... 
First I wrapped burlap around it and hot glued it in place. ( I bought the burlap by the roll, it's much easier than cutting strips!) next I coiled the JUKE (aka twine) around the middle. There's no set amount you should use, just eyeball it and make it look good. 


My next one... 
On this one I used the mustard burlap, twine and an embellishment. That's it! :) 

Note: I did fold the roll of burlap in half so it wasn't as thick. I didn't want to cut it and have it be a complete mess so just fold it if you also don't want a thick band. 

The third one... 
This one I did with red burlap, more twine and an embellishment. I chose to only do two canisters with the flowers but really you could do them all with flowers. 


I glued the flower over the seam so that it hid it from being seen. Either way is fine. 

Last one... 
Easy enough I just wrapped the twine/juke stuff around it and that's it. :) 




I am loving my new baking canisters and they're going to look so cute in my new kitchen! 

If you make these I would love to see them too! You can email them to me @ rebroberts@outlook.com 




 






Friday, January 3, 2014

Short but Sweet..

I realize it's 11:30pm but I had to share! 

Kaden and I got called Sunday to be the new CTR 4 teachers in Primary. We are so stinkin excited! This Sunday is our first week and I have been on a hunt for a cute church bag for about the last 3 months. So at the last min tonight I decided, why not make one! And thats exactly what I did:) 

So here it is, only took me 4 hours to figure out ( I had no pattern to go off of just a picture I found on Pinterest!) 




Thursday, January 2, 2014

Twenty-fourteen

As 2013 has come to an end I look back on this past year. I can't seem to recall having any "FIRSTS" but lots of memories!

 I have definitely experienced trials both good and bad. I have learned to look at things differently and try hard each day to be a better person. I have grown closer to my Heavenly Father, something I still have plenty of room to work on. This year I learned the importance of FAMILY. I have come to the conclusion that I have a slight addiction to coca-cola. There's a reason I don't keep it in our fridge!  Although we didn't have anything big happen this year we did manage to have fun! We did make it to Jackson Hole recently which was a blast! And Kaden sold his first truck for a sweet jeep (were a little bit obsessed!) we absolutely love it! And we had a fun weekend getaway in Bear Lake with Kadens grandparents, Mel and Louise!  


















can't help but to be excited about 2014. Kaden and I have so many thing coming for us that I often find myself wishing the next 4 months away. I hope to enjoy this year, every little thing good or bad.

I couldn't help but to make of list of just a few things (big and small) I would like to accomplish in 2014.




1. Kaden and I learned a lot about finances and money in the fall and I couldn't be more thankful towards my in-laws, they truly do rock! I hope to be right on our budget every month (stop laughing, I really have to tell myself this!) 

2. GET ORGANIZED. I am really good at making my house presentable but what I would really like to accomplish is to be organized! My mother is probably reading this right now thinking "this is the daughter who couldn't see her bedroom floor most of high school". It's true. But to my surprise having my own home makes me a little OCD. Infact I get anxiety when I know I have a messy house awaiting me when I get home from work. 

3. Pray more

4. Sit on a beach! I don't know if it's cause my thermostat reads 64 degrees as I'm sitting here typing this or what but I am dying to be on a beach lately. I feel like during the winter I am anxious for it to be summer and hot but when summer finally decides to show up I'm like really does it have to be 80 degrees today? There's is really no win with me I guess. I think I am going to learn to enjoy the snow and go snowboarding sometime. SIDE NOTE: this is Not a goal.. ;) 

5. Attend the Temple. I think I take the fact that it's a privelage for granted. I love going but tend to let life get in the way sometimes. I have told myself to make it a goal and go twice a month. I hope that out of all my goals I really stick to this one! The church is TRUE. And so many blessings come of it! I'm thankful to have it in my life. 

Last but not least... 

6. Make my bed Every Day. I know how lame this one sounds, I really do! BUT, I came across a thing on Pinterest (big surprise) as I was finding ways to be more organized in life and it was something along the lines about making your bed every morning will make you feel organized/accomplished every night when you crawl in bed. I have secretly been doing this one for about a week and a half right now and I love it. It makes me a little sad to think to myself that I know I won't do this every day in 2014 but I am definitely going to try and make this a habit! 

I am so excited to get this new year started!



**Sorry about the first part of this post being so jumpy. I wrote this late last night and had too many thoughts going on trying to think about everything this past year!